Sadly, dear readers, the inconvenient scheduling of last night’s Mayoral Forum meant Watchers were gathered round Shortland Street on the gas-fired TV set at the LawsWatch Cave, where Sophie, Nate, Tess, Durville, Justine et al were going about their non-business, oblivious to the drama being played out at the Prince Edward Auditorium. Other Watchers, though avid Wanganui Chronicle readers one and all, missed the drama … the conflict … the applause … simply because the Chron managed to forget to tell anyone it was on!

So we are forced rely on reports from no less than the collective geniuses from the Chron, and to piece together comments to this blog (scroll down for the prize snippets) from Watchers who passed up Shortie Street for the night. To summarise:

Mas and Kirsty put together a macabre collection of questions for John and Michael and Russell and Randhir but not Chandra because she was staying home and sulking about something that happened ages ago and sent someone who looked like her Mum to make a nuisance of herself. It got so bad that Mas told her off and then Michael behaved badly and Kirsty made a fool of herself by letting him have his own way. Suddenly Kirsty was being booed and jeered for showing her organ’s Visionary bias in public and then Michael got even more angry and Kirsty was glad when it was all over and she could go home and watch the video of that night’s episode of Shortie Street which she’d had the foresight to tape …

The morning after hang-over must have been a shocker in the Maslin household when he saw what he’d written the night before and waited for the phone to ring with an early dose of mayoral abuse from his buddy Michael:

Martin tops mayoral forum poll

WE CALLED it "forum feedback" and if that decided the outcome of Wanganui's mayoral election race, then we’d have a new mayor! John Martin.

Of those who took part in our ballot, 64 said they'd vote for Mr Martin, 41 for incumbent mayor Mr Laws, one for Mr Fleming and none for Ms Osborne or Mr Dahya. And did the forum help in the voters' decision-making? Sixty-six said it did and 38 said it didn't.

So diVision apparently managed a turnout of roughly the same number of candidates and Bob Walker's fellow realtor Catherine Kennedys as they did at their damp squib launch a week earlier, while Randhir Dayha’s apparently undentable ego got the bash.

But the Cave’s discerning followers of the TV soaps were delighted to find the Chron(ic’s) new soap queen Lin Ferguson, editor Kirsty MacKnucklehead’s fellow Southland Times graduate, writing in the style to which they have become accustomed in a gushing review of Episode 981 of Vision Street in which Wanganui Mayor Michael Laws stars in yet another a crude election special down by the riverfront, specially funded by the Ratepayers of Wanganui …

"Michael Mayor's here! yaaay," a small group of children whispered as the opening of the Riverfront Walkway got under way on Saturday. The balmy, spring day attracted a crowd of more than 300 people to cheer on Wanganui’s latest community project.

Meanwhile, back to the Vision Street reviews provided courtesy LawsWatch’s anonymii:

ML goes Surreal on debt
Anyone who missed the forum this evening passed up the chance to listen to Mickey explain how the $31.5 million we owed in 2004 was actually less than the $67.5 we now owe and the $48 million peak we were predicting in 2004 for 2010 has now actually been reduced to $74.6 million. It was surreal

Jokers, pretenders & losers
Tonight’s mayoral forum illustrated clearly that we have a two man race. Russell Fleming is a joke and Randhir showed us all how badly he is out of his depth. Ms Osborn chose not to attend, but sent a heckler to represent her. Wonder how Randhir Dahya feels this morning? The world's biggest loser maybe?

Business as usual for Chronic
What the Chron didn't say this morning was that it didn't take long for the editor to abandon her presence of neutral chairpersonship and give ML a second crack at a question. Sure, he went through the motions of appearing to throw a wobbly at her but it was plain he was going to get his own way. Why should Monday night be any different to any other day of the week?

Vision lacks numbers
The numbers in the chron say it all - from where I was sitting down the front there appeared to be a formidable chunk of paid-up vision party candidates and their hangers on at the back plus the seriously weird Catherine Kennedy and her long-haired companion. They must have accounted for most of the 41 pro-mickey "votes" between them!

Cornered rat
Laws was really in cornered rat mode last night. The neering/shouting/snarling act probably made some of the Visionaries think wistfully about a change of mayor. I wonder if they are allowed secret votes or if they have to hand over their voting papers for mayoral inspection before putting them in the box.

Poor old Randhir While Russell Fleming turned out to be a worse buffoon than expected, one couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy for Randhir. He was so clearly out of his depth and fumbling ... then with his quote about how "when he is mayor" he'll appoint the highest polling as his deputy he went and spilled the beans on his three bitter years and the deal that Mickey dangled before him to get him to make such a dick of himself by standing for mayor. If he wasn't so old, you'd want to tell him to grow up!